Category: Activities

The Dating Class System to me, could be of 3 levels.

1. Single
2. Exclusive Relationship
3. Married

It’s not too dramatic a classification – and of course, gray areas apply throughout. But for purposes of this post, I’ll stick to 3 simple levels.

As a single person for the last 1.5yrs, I have 2 observations to share.

Observation One: Happily Ever After
People in Class 2 and 3 expect your life to be extremely exciting, in other words, be prepared to sing for your supper when you sit at a tableful of people in relationships. Arm yourself with your most exciting sexcapades, dating dramas and career-driven complaints.

The antithesis of this scenario is for the single person to come with their most self-depreciating stories, which inevitably makes everyone else at the table feel satisfied (read: smug) with their choice to remain monogamous. This, however, is usually accompanied by remarks, such as, “You need to lower your expectations” “Go out more” “You need to expose yourself to more social situations” “Single women over 30 have too much baggage” and my recent personal favourite, “You should marry a friend, like us“.

When did it become ok to offer unsolicited and often unwarranted advice? Why the assumption that one class system is better than the other? Why is marriage the pinnacle of the dating world? How many happily married people do you know? How many relationships do you envy?

I love being single and my opinion shouldn’t affect the choices that anyone else has made in their life, neither should it be pitied. I’m sorry to have to say this out loud, but I am actually happy being single. Which leads to me to my next observation.

Observation Two: Is the fat lady singing already?

It has been recently brought to my attention that I may like the single life, a little too much. I am a self confessed, self professed (what you might call a…) serial dater. To me, this has been a perfectly valid choice to make, in terms of dating style. This approach is minimal commitment, maximum enjoyment and allows me to get to know different people. I was always under the impression that the men I date would appreciate such an open dating concept, as it allows them to openly date other people as well.

Apparently, it’s all fun and games till someone loses a heart.

This dating strategy has recently been classified as “selfish” and thrown me in a slight state of disarray. It’s been raising its objecting hands from all angles, which is unfortunately forcing me to review my grand plan. It seems like the universe is conspiring to get me into a committed relationship. (C-words in relationships are just so unfriendly: commitment, compromise, Caesarean…). I’m not one to ignore the universe, so I am rethinking my blueprint. Maybe it’s about time.

This is, therefore, the gray area I mentioned earlier. Within the Single class system, there are still many sub-levels of commitment, often the least being abhorred.

In this spirit, here’s Rupert Holmes’, “Him” for your listening and identifying pleasure.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUygQh0iaf8]

Over by the window, there’s a pack of cigarettes
Not my brand, you understand, sometimes the girl forgets
She forgets to hide them, I know who left those smokes behind
She’ll say, “Oh he’s just a friend”
And I’ll say, Oh, I’m not blind to him

 

What’s she gonna do about him
She’s gonna have to do without him
Or do without me
No one gets to get it for free
It’s me or it’s him

Don’t know what he looks like
Don’t know who he is
Don’t know why, she thought that I would say what’s mine is his
I don’t want to own her
But I can’t let her have it both ways
Three is one to many of us
She leaves with me, or says with him

What’s she gonna do about him
She’s gonna have to do without him
Or do without me
No one gets to get it for free
It’s me or it’s him

If she wants to, she can have him
Just exactly how we once were
It’s goodbye to you and I
Back to her and I without him

What’s she gonna do about him
She’s gonna have to do without him
Or do without me
Not one gets to get it for free
Time for me to make the girl see
It’s me or it’s him
What’s she gonna do about him
She’s gonna have to do without him
Or do without me.

—————————–

Note: This post was not written to create discord between the class systems. But if there’s anything that I’ve learnt in life, it’s that happy endings are a lot more fun when you’re single.

Well, it’s about bloody time. I seem to have successfully integrated Phuket into my life as a yearly event (and mind you, I’m talking about the heart of tourist town, Patong – not those wussy serene outlying villas). I love it all – the mass of gross white bodies, the never ending cry of “marrsagge” from Thai girls on the corner,  sweet pomelo on the beach and having evening cocktails in front of women with cocks.

I know exactly where I’ll be staying, where my first meal will be (Italian restaurant in a little lane off Patong called La Cucina makes the best amatriciana sauce), where I’ll go for my massages (2 hours in the day, foot massage at night). It’s the comfort of a ready-to-slip-in holiday that truly gives me the relaxation I need. I won’t feel the need to explore new territories for fear of wasting precious time. Although, I should probably try to go somewhere new next year.

So long, suckers!

So, we got a Friday halfsie in lieu of the public holiday falling on last Saturday – better than nothing, so I decided to take full advantage of it.

I had a sashimi filled Japanese lunch, bought a pair of black suede rounded front pumps (so beautiful and exactly what I’ve been looking for), and a 2 hour massage. Delicious.

This was followed later on by a wonderful, conversation filled dinner with Sim at 7ate9 at the Esplanade (brilliant service, I would highly recommend it. The beef sashimi was good too) and a party session at Butter.

I’m saddened by the way Butter is turning out – I hope this is the storm before the calm. It was way too packed with people who were obviously there thinking it’s the place to be. I was in the loo with about 20 girls, who all spoke Mandarin (and that was never the case at the old Butter – it was always a mixed group of people with the common love for RnB). If there’s no room to dance at a nightclub, what’s the point? I really miss old ambience where everyone was friendly and it was like a huge family instead of the faceless void (which is why I was never a Zouk fan).

I will not desert Butter – my plan is to spend more time in the electro room (which has still maintained its original crowd and styling) and see what happens to the crowd boom. Boom boom pow.