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TV Taste.

Opinion posts are always difficult. Everyone has an opinion and usually gets defensive about it. So, let me prefix this by saying this post is made in my opinion and shouldn’t affect anyone else’s judgement or personal preferences.

There are some TV shows I love and some I have absolutely no idea why they are popular. Maybe I just don’t get it but at least, I try to watch them before declaring they’re just not for me. (Shit, any more disclaimers I need to add?) So, I’ll start first with my favourite TV shows – which definitely can be mocked at. I never proclaimed to have stellar taste, just distinctive.

Oh, how I still love my Buffy The Vampire Slayer. That’s right, I still watch it from Season 1 to 7 and start again. The only superfluous character they took 2 seasons to make less annoying was Dawn, Buffy’s surprise sister played by Michelle Trachtenberg. If I was allowed only one TV on a stranded island, I’d take this and still try to get off the island (more on that to come).

As a Joss Whedon fan, you gotta love Firely. Shame about the show cancel, but heck, there’s always the movie “Serenity”. Follow Nathan Fillion on Twitter, he’s adorable. The pace of this show (as with most of Whedon’s work) is well played out, the banter and dialogues layered and usually British influenced and the chemistry, near perfect. At all times, you know the relationships between every single character – which Joss Whedon stunningly fleshes out within the first 5 minutes of “Serenity” (the movie).

Big Love is a show that has steadily not let me down with any episode for going on 4 seasons now. Every episode is explosive, intriguing and everyone plays their part to perfection. I adore Chloe Sevigny and think she does an amazing job on this show. Just when I think the plot can’t get any more crazy, it does.

I love Law & Order, slightly more than SVU, because they usually divide an equal amount of time to persecuting as catching. Plus, Sam Waterson is hot – he was Nick Carraway, for Pete’s sake! I cannot turn away from this show, if it’s on, I’m watching it.

I was a late bloomer into Californication but I’ve caught up quickly enough and have gotten caught up in the wonder that’s this show. I’ve always loved David Duchovny’s comedic forays (Return to Me, Trust the Man, Evolution…) so it makes sense that I love Californication. Life imitates art but I wonder how much of Hank Moody is David Duchovny (sex addiction, notwithstanding)?

Other notable mentions would be The United States of Tara (just one season young), The Tudors (one more season before it’s out of production), Weeds (5 seasons in and I still find the first season the most powerful) and Entourage (6 seasons in and waning as each season progresses).

So, that’s the  good stuff. Here’s the stuff I just don’t get.

What’s it been now? 6 seasons and their asses still on that island? Matthew Fox is hot and all (yes, was a fan from Party of 5 days) but for god’s sake – even Tom Hanks got off his island.

The world’s most annoying detective. Tony Shaloub should have just stuck to playing an alien in Men in Black and left us alone. We get it, he’s OCD. Haha. We get it, he’s still got OCD – let the hilarity ensue. For some reason, even just thinking about this show makes my face hurt from all the cringing it’s doing. Even an ad of the show makes me feel like hurling.

Ok, this one is a big one. I am aware that How I Met Your Mother gets big ratings and big fans. For the life of me, I have no idea why. I’ve watched a bunch of full episodes and greatest hits, and honestly, I’d rather watch re-runs of Doogie Howser. I love Jason Segel and Alyson Hannigan and of course, Neil Patrick Harris but I really cannot stomach this show. I am not a fan of its pace – it goes for very quick hits, I find Harris overacts for the most part and the cast chemistry stiff and forced. But clearly, I am one of the VERY FEW people who don’t find this show amusing. True story.

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(Typos and grammar mistakes sold separately)
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I know I’m a pogonophile but seriously…

Yes, I have blogged numerous times about the men I adore – and even more so, their beards. I am very open about my fetish for facial hair, and fully grown beards astound me. I was going through my music collection and paused (as always) on Kenny Loggins’ album artwork.

I absolutely love this picture – look at that masterful pairing of billowing hair and full and manly beard. My god, that’s a beautiful sight to behold. And so, I dug deeper into the Loggins and Messina phase – where he had the FULL ON hair and beard combo.

I could gnaw on that beard for hours. Love Kenny Loggins.

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Friends Divided.

The topic of friendship has been on my mind for several weeks now.

The art of making friends and keeping friends gets increasingly difficult as I get older. I consider myself discerning (over discerning, at that) towards the friends I keep and I find myself with fewer and fewer true friends of whose company I truly and wholly enjoy.

Of course, I am aware that I am solely responsible for my destiny.

Making Friends

I see a few problems with trying to make new friends, in this day, age and time.

  1. Breaking into a new group
    Usually, the person you’re interested in being friends with already has an existing group of friends – this means you will have finagle some alone time or be the newbie in this new group. There’s no guarantee that the entire group will be friendly to you, but you have to stomach it if this person is worth it. It’s also a good way to gauge if your new friend is genuine about being your friend.
  2. Commonalities
    I have found that the first few times you hang out or get to know this new friend is hardly enough to determine if you guys can be BFFs. It’s only through the slightly deeper discussions about the usual topics like boys and jobs do you realise how alike your values are. The last thing I want to feel is judged for my choices or even worse, judge someone else for theirs. I also wouldn’t want to feel like the slut of the group or conversely, the prude.

    I have always found it difficult to find friends that cover the gamut of things I enjoy, especially female friends. It’s pretty hard to find a girlfriend that loves dancing for 6 hours straight to RnB, wouldn’t mind getting drunk at 11am on beach vacations and would go for a Kool & The Gang as well as a Nine Inch Nails concert. I have come to realise that this is impossible to find in just the one girlfriend. (That’s why people have significant others – so they’re forced to do all these things with you…)

  3. Fear of rejection
    Trying to find a new friend is definitely like trying to date someone. You have to be slightly shameless in asking them out or trying to integrate yourself in their group. You also to be mildly persistent and be prepared that you may not be accepted or invited to join this friendship. Unfortunately, I completely have no balls to face the fear of rejection and often find myself giving up after 1 or 2 attempts.

Keeping Friends

This is the hard part. I’ve failed to keep any of my good friends from high school with me and even now, I still think it’s impossible because I find the differences too vast – in terms of values (since I have none) and part of me knows that I am unwilling to try.

I made my best friends when I was 25 years old, and we met when we were flying. I truly believe that we had a bunch of good times, as much as any bunch of girls could. But our paths have slowly deviated from each other, and what appeared to be parallel has now taken turns from the same route. One of them is married and about to have her second child. Beyond the truly happy feelings I have for her blessed family, it also signifies a deep change in our relationship. Gone will be the days of drunken partying and after-hour suppers and instead, will continue our starting tradition of dinner at 6 in the evenings and quarter year partying. Her life as a family woman is strong and commitments solidified –  and I would have to fit myself into her lifestyle and I don’t really see it going any other way. I am in no way resentful of this, I celebrate her happiness but I miss her. How selfish is that. 🙂

And then there’s my other best friend. She is recently married and obviously, space is needed to establish a new routine and life to support the move. I have to come to realise a dependency on her presence in my life (and yes, this is where it gets a little sad in my life’s representation) – she’s the sole person I rely on to get my party groove on and I am finding this both unreliable (she has a life, duh) and unfair for me to put this all on one person (and also, not very wise).

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So… what now? Is making new friends past thirty impossible? Should I resign myself to knitting in bed on a Friday night while watching a rerun of Law and Order*? And no, a man is not the same thing as a best friend, not even close. I have decided to try and be a little ballsy and get me a few friends to hang and just have good times with. Good luck to me!

*This is not currently happening. At least, not the knitting part.
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Movies I’m ashamed to like.

I definitely consider myself a movie person – I’m a big fan of 80’s movies and high school movies (and these are the ones I don’t consider embarrassing). But, like everyone, I have my guilty pleasures and would never admit to liking but have decided that shame was for my 20’s.

Now, my wide array of 80’s and 90’s movies don’t count because the obscure (and often embarrassing ones) would have become cult favourites already (I would place movies like Lucas, Cutting Edge, Point Break, Just One of The Guys, etc… in there). Majority of my favourite high school movies shouldn’t count either because there is usually an element of intelligence and humour in there (movies like Bring It On, Can’t Hardly Wait, She’s All That…). I am not ashamed to like these movies.

The ones I am ashamed of, on the other hand, are the ones that I don’t personally own in my collection but yet, every time they are screened on cable, I get a little excited and must catch them (usually, I will rewatch the screenings too). So, let’s start with the most humiliating (and from then on, are in no order of shame)

Maid in Manhattan: That’s right. I’ve seen this movie. Many times. I loathe that I can’t stop watching it whenever it’s on. Jennifer Lopez is seriously a shitty actor and Ralph Fiennes is a good actor (save for the accent) in a horribly written role for an overall cheap and predictable premise of a movie. And still, I’ll watch it whenever it shows. (Trailer)

The Holiday: God help me, Cameron Diaz pretending to act at trying to cry, screaming to the Killers, Kate Winslet jumping on a bed and Jack Black trying to act suave? You’d think these acts would be impetus enough to change the channel, but no… I’ll get comfortable and watch it every time it’s on. And still get all swoony over Jude Law (and I don’t even like him!) (Trailer)

I (Still) Know What You Did Last Summer: I would consider liking the first installment of this storyline fairly entertaining and almost in line with Scream – it had a good modern infusion into a classic genre, with (then) up and coming actors. But liking the sequel… now I know that is just wrong. For one thing, Brandy is acting in it and the killer is the son of that Fisherman?! Who goes that far for revenge? Who has the the time, energy and resources? Maybe I just have the hots for Jennifer Love Hewitt and Freddy Prinze Jr (at least I don’t like that Scooby Doo movie…). (Trailer)

Independence Day: I think end of day movies like Deep Impact, The Day After Tomorrow etc… are pretty good. Armageddon sucked balls and even Mars Attacks! was better than it. I am really not sure where to place Independence Day. Should it be considered a guilty pleasure or do many other people actually enjoy watching this movie? Bill Pullman was ridiculous as the President (although in all fairness, he’s ridiculous in most of his movies), Jeff Goldblum played his one role as usual, the stripper and the President’s wife, Harry Connick Jr in general and a computer programme saving the world. America saves the day! (Trailer)

Disturbing Behavior: Oh sweet Lord. This one is definitely shame-worthy. What is disturbing is the shoddy level of acting on top of the overall movie premise – a small town performing behaviour-modification on its youth to behave all 50’s and compliant. I can’t go on any further without sounding like a complete nut-job for liking this movie.(Trailer)

The Jane Austen Book Club: I have watched this movie a countless amount of times. I can practically quote it verbatim. Kathy Baker is frequently annoying, Emily Blunt is the saving grace, Hugh Dancy is cute (but with an odd non-location specific accent) and everyone else are just peripherals to “add layers” to a click flick. Single, often wed, lesbian, divorcee, unhappily wed – anymore female stereotypes in there and the movie would explode. (Trailer)

Daylight: Ok, I love my Stallone – the Rocky movies, Oscar, Tango & Cash. And god help me, I love Daylight. I love watching him try to get to the people stuck in the tunnel, rally them together and I always, always, cheer on for the safety of the dog towards the final scene. Is this considered a guilty pleasure? It may not be. (Actually, I wouldn’t mind owning this movie.) (Trailer)

Urban Legend: Jared Leto, Rebecca Gayheart, Joshua Jackson and Tara Reid (need I say more?) supporting Alicia Witt (hot off the TV series, Cybill) in a whodunnit movie with, once again, a badly dressed killer in oversized boots and a trench. I have absolutely no idea why I enjoy this movie, it’s definitely not the bad acting, investigating of strange noises, typecasting or poor film editing. (Trailer)

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I would definitely think Maid In Manhattan is a low-point of my movie choices in life as much as I can claim to hate these movies, I can’t stop watching them. Maybe it’s more of the “car crash” theory vs. actually appreciating the film. Maybe it’s the opportunity to be able to switch off and just watch a brainless movie (with no surprises or post-movie depression that lasts days – see: Boys Don’t Cry or American History X).

I don’t think movies like Requiem For A Dream or American History X can be considered a “favourite movie of all time” – for anyone. I refuse to believe that you would take Requiem to a desert island if it was your one movie choice (unless you need inspiration to strangle yourself with a noose fashioned out of a coconut husks). It is an amazing film on so many levels but hardly a weekly repeat. I often wonder about the mental state of people who claim these types of serious films as their “favourite” movie. I mostly think they’re trying to look deep.

For me, my all-time favourite movie would be have to be Singles. It’s got everything I could ever dream of: a great script, cinematography, Alice in Chains and Soundgarden performing, members of Pearl Jam in cameos, amazing soundtrack, cast chemistry and the Cameron Crowe magic of before. (Citizen Dick scene)

** There are probably a gazillion spelling and grammar mistakes in this post but who cares? **
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Life favours the young.

The subject of procreation rears its ugly head at the most inopportune times. It’s almost like an annoying child that keeps trying to interrupt adult conversation, only to say something completely nonsensical and irrelevant (as children often do).

The very meaning of “life” – existence, creating new life – is a concept that is best exercised while young. I can think of almost no benefits of being a mature parent – other than having more life experience but not enough energy to extend it.

Based on medical reasons alone, it is far more advantageous to have a child when you’re younger (we’re talking below 30’s here), which I think is really unfair (we’ll get to that later).

Getting Pregnant in the first place

Your fertility drops when you hit 30 and onwards – which to me, makes no sense. You’d think that your body would understand that you’ve wanted to spend your time progressing your career, finding the right life partner, creating a comfortable home environment and thus let the amniotic fluids flow like the rivers of Babylon. But no, instead, you are your most fertile when you are your most stupid (teenage years) and want to have the most fun (20’s). It’s like Nature is fiercely determined to mock your life.

Over the years, the dinner and cocktail conversation has been moving further from “in heat” to “in vitro” – from “dirty weekends” to “conception weekends”. As my generation progresses, so does the ever consuming need to go forth and multiply. Turns out, the capability you cursed in the disco days, is a luxury you now long for. A missed period used to catch your breath in fear, now in excitement.

The Pregnancy Bloom

I believe this bloom to be a myth. I have yet to meet a woman who blossoms during her pregnancy, with rosy cheeks and a gait to her step. Instead, I’ve had meals with more than one expectant woman who can could barely eat and those that could eat, would – mid-sentence – dash to the bathroom for the hourly session of regurgitation. I’ve heard the complaints of having to buy new shoes for expanding feet and seen a foetus’ elbow stick out of a woman’s midsection (and if you think that is disturbing, it’s even more scarring to see the woman nudge it back in). I’ve seen the nipples, the scars, the failed breast-feeding attempts and that’s just wrong.

Perhaps the most disconcerting is the health issues a mature woman faces when she gets pregnant. They are more susceptible to miscarriages, premature births and other pregnancy related illnesses. For the baby, they are more at risk of Down’s Syndrome and other abnormalities. The whole pregnancy is awash with worry, nervousness and painful (and pricey) testing.

So there’s a baby, now what?

After all that, you got the baby. Big whoop. Now, you’re probably at the height of your career and either exhaust yourself  trying to maintain it and raise a prodigy or you have to take a step down from the career ladeer for sanity’s sake. And by the time you turn 60, your child is barely out of university and faces the financial task of having to eventually care for you.

Closing Argument

I believe Nature had engineered youth as the ideal time for child-manufacturing because our life expectancy was a lot shorter than before. But due to our own uncontrollable intelligence to lengthen our life span and carve a semblance of a career (beyond tending to our cavemen, cave-chiselling men), we’ve evolved past our bodies and what they are capable of doing best. I don’t know if our bodies would ever catch up, but I do wish that it was at least an even playing field at any age. Either you’re 25 with children, regretting not doing more with your life – or you’re 35, with a high-flying career yet trying to suppress the biological clock. Is it really impossible to not have it all? Even if you can have it all, would you be any good at it?

I would like to end this post by saying that I do not have children. At this point of my life, I have no desire to have children. This is mostly because I don’t like children and subscribe to ye’ ole’ mentality of “children should be seen and not heard”. I find them an entirely too sassy bunch nowdays. I hate being ambushed by acquaintances showing me pictures of their children and me, being lost for words. My latest remark/mumble was, “Oh… looks… like you”. I kick kids ankles at McDonald’s when they get in my way. I believe a lot of people have children either out of narcissism or boredom.

But for all this talk, it would be nice to know that if I wanted to have a child at some point of my life, it wouldn’t be too late.

So far, the only kid I like (my god-daughter).