noellelynn writes

I snapped this shot of my desk when I got in the morning (yes, this is first thing in the morning). Occasionally, I tidy up my desk before I leave but sometimes, you just gotta drop it like it’s hot. Looking at this picture, I realise I have an obsession with Post-It notes. And pink stationery. (And you can also see how the papers + reference books eventually flood over the keyboard, therefore resulting in leaning and bad posture)

I was at Mimolette last Friday for some Star Signs party and they had a Tarot card reader on hand so of course I rushed over and got a reading. After shuffling and selecting the cards, his opening line was, “Have you recently broken up with someone?” I immediately cursed at him! So, he continued (slightly unfazed) and said that I am very disappointed in relationships and am avoiding them for now but building up a lot of negative energy. I am, however, channelling some of this negative energy into work, which is developing well. Sheesh, this guy freaked me out. So, his advice was to not jump into a relationship but instead work on this negative energy thing and be more open. We’ll see.

 My father retires tomorrow. I am actually very glad about that before he has been travelling to and from Jurong every day for about… 30 years now? Maybe more? My dad is a really active person – who I think will fill his time well with the activities he jam-packs into the weekends. I am also looking at putting him on some outstanding errands I have. Put the fella to good use.

Let’s be honest. I’ve been dating for a while now and I’m hard pressed to find a date that truly impressed me (sans one). Don’t men get that women want an alpha male? I’m not talking brutish, over-muscular alpha males – I’m talking about taking control of the situation at least for the first 3 dates, before graciously  surrendering control forever.

Good first date behaviour

Transport
If you do not own a car, please arrange for a cab to pick her up. Be at the location early to meet the cab and pay for the fare. You do not have to send her back in a cab if you live ridiculously far apart but you can offer to pay. If she’s a lady, she will reject the offer.

Flowers
I hate flowers, so I might be biased against this one. Generally, if she’s above 18, carrying flowers out on a date is humiliating – so be gentlemanly and get them delivered to her house while she’s getting ready (this requires time planning and logistics but I’ve had this done before and it really softens you up for a date).

Restaurant
There is absolutely no excuse for a man to not make reservations on a date. Do not ask her where to go, either. A man should have friends to ask on opinions on dinner places, else failing, there’s Google! You can, however, give her a choice of 2 locations/cuisines if you wish to be chivalrous and play to her preference. If you have never eaten there before, read some reviews so you can make some enlightening comments like, “I’ve heard the fish is good”. Generally, women don’t like clueless men.

Be Unusual
Beyond a plain old dinner date, an unusual date is usually a great opportunity to get to know someone’s inhibitions and willing to try something new/different. A lunch/brunch date (not wildly adventurous) is different and lets you spend almost a full day with her, if you really want to get to know her.

Ice-skating is another great idea (bring a jacket along for her) and only costs about $18 per person (including skates) for 2 hours. And I personally find bowling under-rated. You get to have a little competitive flirting and wear bowling shoes (which I’ve always thought were cute). Bring a little sumthin-sumthin to drink to make the date more fitting to the age group.

The Movies
I’m hesitant to recommend going to the movies for a first date. There’s little interaction so I would usually recommend the movie before dinner. This gives you both conversation during dinner should there be uncomfortable silence. Also, please research the movie – to check out the level of sexual activity/nudity which could potentially make for an awkward moment (see: the sex scene in Monster’s Ball). Also, Gold Class all the way.
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So you see, it’s really not that tough. The formula is simple if you’re keen to get it right. If you are not that into the girl, just meet up for drinks and call it a night. But if you want to get to know someone well, start off on the right foot and make an effort.

Ok, time for me to get ready for Friday night.

1. Start a savings account
2. Get an exercise bike (screw the gym)
3. Go to Phuket (again)
4. Learn how to drive
5. Go on the perfect date (it’s really not that hard. Pick me up, go to a really nice restaurant with pre-arranged reservations, drinks, send me home)
6. Buy a bicycle with a basket for Dolce
7. Get a yellow outfit and wear it convincingly

This list is in no order of attack and I wish there was a way to make this post stick. I hope to be able to add and remove items off this list. Actually, I will not allow myself to add anything to the list until something is removed.

Here goes!